Bob Schnelker would've been proud

As most know, one of my passions is coaching youth sports, and my favorite sport to coach is Football. This year the Bloomington Association that my son Jake plays in had a draft (instead of a blind draw). Apparently they thought this would make things more fair. Why? Because the good coaches know the good athletes, the bad coaches don't know them or don't care.

At the conclusion of this year's draft, I walked out with '85 Bears, except my QB doesn't say a word. Our team cruised through the first half of the season 6-0 (winning by an average score of 40+ to zero)....allowing only 1 TD.

(this is where the story gets interesting) In game 7, my Walter Payton/Mike Singletary comes down with H1N1. Despite him out, we are leading 16-12 with 2:30 left in the game. I just need to get 1 first down and its over. The other team is crowding the line big time, so I decide to throw a bomb to Willie Gault (aka Jake Zosel) and end it right there. My QB fakes the dive, but the RB runs into him as he's throwing. Pass picked off, they take it to the house, we lose 18-16. 6-1....kids crying, the other team celebrates like 1980 US Olympic Hockey Team on Red Bull.

Fast Forward...we get Payton/Singletary back and run the table to the Championship yesterday. And we play the team that "beat" us.

At no point in my coaching career have I run such a Vanilla offense in my life as I did yesterday...as the title of the blog states it would have made Bob Schnelker blush (former Vikes OC who was under constant scrutiny for bad/conservative play calling).

We threw the ball 2 times (normally we air it out 12-15 times). We ran 4 different plays (no misdirection, no reverses, no hook and ladders, no double passes, no waggles, no spread, no wildcat, no pistol) and won in workman like fashion 34-7. While calling plays, I felt like Steve Sax on a grounder to second, every time I had the down-out-and up called, I'd see that kid takin' it to the house in the previous game and I couldn't spit it out. Instead it was Dive, Sweep, Dive, Crossbuck....touchdown. Dive, Sweep, Dive, Crossbuck....touchdown.

So the next time you're watching a game and your team's Offensive Coordinator/Head Coach stays conservative....cut him some slack. I now know what's in their head....and it ain't pretty.

Yankees/Twins

"...then David reached back and threw the stone and hit the Philistene in the head, knocking him to the ground..."

Here is why this would be the greatest upset in MN Sports History (this is Hickory vs. South Bend Central all over again):

Payroll NYY: $207 Million (down from 209 from 2008)

Payroll MN: $65 Million (up from 56 from 2008)

Opening Game Starter NYY: CC Sabathia (Perennial Cy Young Candidate)

Opening Game Starter MN: Brian Duensing (nothing needs to be said here)

NYY out because of injury: N/A

MN Twins out because injury: Justin Morneau (All Star/MVP), Joe Crede (Former All Star) Kevin Slowey (All Star), and Glen Perkins (#3 starter)

NYY DH: Hideki Matsui

MN Twins DH: Brendan Harris (yes, a backup infielder is hitting DH!!!!!)

They always say defense wins championships. The Twins could put 14 guys out there the rest of the way and it won't matter, we don't have the bats or the arms to compete outside of the laughable AL Central.

I guess winning "Division" Titles versus teams with slightly higher payrolls - Kansas City (70 Mil), Cleveland (85 Mil -- jettisoned a lot of it mid-season), Chicago (96 Mil) and Detroit (113 Mil) - will have to do.

I can just hear Gardy (Coach Dale) saying "my team is on the floor..." after crew chief Tim Tschida comes over with the lineup card and says "Brendan Harris (aka Buddy) at DH???Really?!!!!"

Go Twins (Hickory)

Musings from MN

Needless to say this is one of the crazier weeks in MN sports history. Here are a few thoughts from my perspective on the week that was and hopefully will be...

Last Wednesday the Twins lost Game 3 (0f 4) to the Tigers in Detroit going 3 games back with 4 to go. Without any Major League pitchers (okay, Joe Nathan is Major League), without a guy named Justin Morneau, and the Tigers at home for these last 4, most (including myself) were saying GAME OVER. I was wrong (first time for everything). At this point the rest is history: the Twins win game 4 to inch to within 2 with 3 to go, the Whitey Tidies beat the Tigers 2 out of 3 and the Twins sweep the Omaha Royals to force a game today for the right to play my least favorite team NYY (David and Goliath blog forthcoming).

On Saturday, my favorite team lost to my least favorite team in spirit crushing college football fashion. Next Topic.

Sunday afternoon was the icing on the cake for today's 1 and done playoff with the Tigers.

Add all of this to the circus that was last night at Mall of America Field (what the heck is that anyway?). So while watching my favorite NFL team beat up my least favorite NFL team I check my Facebook account. The swirl of Viking chatter amazes me...this town loves it's Purple. But then I read a tweet by a woman "friend" from Madison....she writes "I wish that ESPN and Brett Favre would just get a room." That's when it hit me (and hopefully her too), that for 16 years we (Vikes Fans) nearly lost our lunch every time the guy completed a pass and the announcers would gush. The ESPN guys were actually doing a pretty good job last night considering the circumstances (Mike Tirico amusingly called it a circus at least 2 times). Until they (Jon Gruden specifically) started talking about how many great throws he had made in practice in years gone by (really?!!! practice, do we really care how he threw a ball in practice 10 years ago....really???). So they show this "never been released" footage of Brett Favre throwing passes in practice in his GB days. Yes, they showed him throw at least ten 40-50 yard passes in practice....probably the worst sports broadcasting moment since the Natalie Gulbis show aired on the Golf Channel in 2007.

All in all, a fun few days up in here in Minny....and we haven't even dropped a puck yet (professionally anyway, my 9 year old has been going strong since August 25)!

If all goes well, another Fave team will be playing my least Fave this week.

Go Twins.