Winter Musings

For those of you who ever followed Sid Hartman's column, my Winter Musings is my attempt at his Jottings.

1. Winter Ice: This has been the greatest outdoor ice season in my memory. Granted, we've had a couple 3 day cold snaps and a few major snow dumpings...but for the most part since mid December its been in the 20's with very low wind. Nothing better than skating outside. The sounds, the smells, the runny noses, the cold toes, the rosey cheeks, the wet gloves...man nothing better. For my friends in warmer climates...eat your hearts out.

2. Pennant Fever: Somebody throw me into a snowbank, I got Pennant Fever. Pitchers and Catchers report...the Twins have live arms, 2 MVP's, and a great supporting cast to a decent team from last year. If the Twins win the Central....this is their year to put up a fight in the ALDS. No more Bye Week for the Yankees, Red Sox, or Angels.

3. Carrot Top: Since when did Carrot Top become such a great Snow Boarder? He's a much better athlete than comedian.

4a. Gophers: Can the Gopher sports programs get any lower. Going into this Fall, we had a new stadium for football, a returning NCAA basketball team that had 10 returning players and a top 10 recruiting class. Can you spell NIT? Oops, I'm sure most of you can...but not so sure about Al Nolen. Hockey? See 4b.

4b. Will a first round loss in the WCHA playoffs cost Don Lucia his job? IT BETTER. No matter the excuse....a state dripping with NHL prospects, NHL alums, National Championships should never be on the road for the WCHA playoffs.

5. Which American hockey team will show up during the Olympics? The Nagano troublemaking/ whiners? The Lake Placid Miracles? Or the WE'RENOTTHATGOODABRONZEWOULDBEAWESOME's?

6. Favorite Winter Olympic Sport: Ski Jumping. Has anyone ever seen that jump over near Hyland in Bloomington? Just looking at that thing loosens my bowel!

7. Derby: Only 71 days until the Kentucky Derby.

8. Golf: Approximately 70 days until I make my first double bogey!

9. Tiger Rant: Speaking of double bogeys, does anyone really care what Tiger Woods is going to say on Friday? Really, Tiger? The last thing "the people" want to see is a contrived press conference where you control the questions. All they want to see is your facial reconstruction, after that they will probably have the TV set to MUTE and wait for the sound bite. Sorry dude, that's how it works. No one really cares about you and your "situation". And one more thing, if you say you're playing in the Masters this year....I'll be sure not to laugh. No one in the world expected you to miss the Masters.

10. Peyton: Hey Peyton Manning -- I could care less if you shake hands with the other team 25 minutes after you threw the most famous Super Bowl PICK 6 since Willie Brown housed one on the Vikes in Super Bowl XI. If it were NFL protocol or tradition to shake hands after the game (ala the NHL), then sure you're a baby. But the NFL doesn't do that, so you have nothing to apologize for. This country apologizes way too much.

Sorry if this blog was too short (or too long). Sorry if it offended you. Sorry if I made fun of someone. Sorry if, Sorry if, Sorry if, Sorry if....

What Happened to the Dynasty?

My sports personality was formed in the 70's and 80's. Those two decades will be remembered for bad uniforms and really good teams. Here are just a few:

Hockey: Canadiens (76-79), Islanders (80-84) and Oilers (84-90)

Football: Cowboys, Steelers, and Niners

Baseball: The Big Red Machine

Pro Hoops: Lakers and Celtics

College Hoops: UCLA

College FB: N/A

Since 1990, the only dynasty that comes to mind are the Chicago Bulls and Tiger Woods.

Here's my theory why:

GREED (and Boredom)

No Coaches: Bear Bryant coached Alabama for like 30 years and he won National Championships galore. He was probably the richest guy (and most well known) in the whole state of Alabama. Do you think $8 million a year and being beloved by the state of Alabama will keep Nick Saban at Alabama? Doubt it. Eventually winning a couple national championships won't be enough and he'll move onto a higher paying higher profile pro job.....no dynasty for the Tide.

No Players: If a team wins a ton of games and a championship, even if they are the NYY, they still won't have the cash to keep all of their talent. The way professional sports leagues are set up with salary caps and free agency it is nearly impossible to assemble a dynasty. The Edmonton Oilers had assembled the greatest string of players, won championships with ease....one small problem, Peter Pocklington (the Oilers owner) went bankrupt in doing so. So what did he do? He sold his great asset to the LA Kings....Wayne Gretzky to save his own ____.

No Administration: Don't just blame the players and coaches. If you assemble a great team whether it be a great college or pro team, you will be in demand. If you are a pro sports GM and your team wins, you then get greedy and want to be president of the team (see Andy McPhail), which means you don't do anything except start every sentence with, "when I was in _______", and no one argues with you. Shoot sign me up for that job.

Potential Dynasties: The NYY have a legit shot...they have the players, the pitching, a pretty solid manager, and decent admin. The Lakers do to...great player (Kobe), great coach (Phil Jackson) and a respectable GM (Kupchak).

Renewed Dynasty: Some of the greatest men in history have fallen prey to the sword of a woman. Funny how he had it all: talent, administration (the best advisors in the world), coaching, passion, etc.....his greed was just shown in a different light. A recovered Tiger Woods will be scary. I can't wait see what he does now that he has been humbled....he may best Jack's 18 Majors faster than anyone would have ever predicted.

False Dynasties: 'bama....no chance (see above), Pittsburgh Penguins (no money to sustain see Oilers), NFL.....impossible, College Hoops.....impossible.

Am I missing anyone, any team? Or am I just missing it?

Editors Note (yeah, I'm big time now I have a guy who reads it before it goes out): Jimmie Johnson - NASCAR, Pete Sampras and Roger Federer - Tennis, and NYY in the mid 90's would all qualify (man, I hate the Yankees).

Bob Schnelker would've been proud

As most know, one of my passions is coaching youth sports, and my favorite sport to coach is Football. This year the Bloomington Association that my son Jake plays in had a draft (instead of a blind draw). Apparently they thought this would make things more fair. Why? Because the good coaches know the good athletes, the bad coaches don't know them or don't care.

At the conclusion of this year's draft, I walked out with '85 Bears, except my QB doesn't say a word. Our team cruised through the first half of the season 6-0 (winning by an average score of 40+ to zero)....allowing only 1 TD.

(this is where the story gets interesting) In game 7, my Walter Payton/Mike Singletary comes down with H1N1. Despite him out, we are leading 16-12 with 2:30 left in the game. I just need to get 1 first down and its over. The other team is crowding the line big time, so I decide to throw a bomb to Willie Gault (aka Jake Zosel) and end it right there. My QB fakes the dive, but the RB runs into him as he's throwing. Pass picked off, they take it to the house, we lose 18-16. 6-1....kids crying, the other team celebrates like 1980 US Olympic Hockey Team on Red Bull.

Fast Forward...we get Payton/Singletary back and run the table to the Championship yesterday. And we play the team that "beat" us.

At no point in my coaching career have I run such a Vanilla offense in my life as I did yesterday...as the title of the blog states it would have made Bob Schnelker blush (former Vikes OC who was under constant scrutiny for bad/conservative play calling).

We threw the ball 2 times (normally we air it out 12-15 times). We ran 4 different plays (no misdirection, no reverses, no hook and ladders, no double passes, no waggles, no spread, no wildcat, no pistol) and won in workman like fashion 34-7. While calling plays, I felt like Steve Sax on a grounder to second, every time I had the down-out-and up called, I'd see that kid takin' it to the house in the previous game and I couldn't spit it out. Instead it was Dive, Sweep, Dive, Crossbuck....touchdown. Dive, Sweep, Dive, Crossbuck....touchdown.

So the next time you're watching a game and your team's Offensive Coordinator/Head Coach stays conservative....cut him some slack. I now know what's in their head....and it ain't pretty.

Yankees/Twins

"...then David reached back and threw the stone and hit the Philistene in the head, knocking him to the ground..."

Here is why this would be the greatest upset in MN Sports History (this is Hickory vs. South Bend Central all over again):

Payroll NYY: $207 Million (down from 209 from 2008)

Payroll MN: $65 Million (up from 56 from 2008)

Opening Game Starter NYY: CC Sabathia (Perennial Cy Young Candidate)

Opening Game Starter MN: Brian Duensing (nothing needs to be said here)

NYY out because of injury: N/A

MN Twins out because injury: Justin Morneau (All Star/MVP), Joe Crede (Former All Star) Kevin Slowey (All Star), and Glen Perkins (#3 starter)

NYY DH: Hideki Matsui

MN Twins DH: Brendan Harris (yes, a backup infielder is hitting DH!!!!!)

They always say defense wins championships. The Twins could put 14 guys out there the rest of the way and it won't matter, we don't have the bats or the arms to compete outside of the laughable AL Central.

I guess winning "Division" Titles versus teams with slightly higher payrolls - Kansas City (70 Mil), Cleveland (85 Mil -- jettisoned a lot of it mid-season), Chicago (96 Mil) and Detroit (113 Mil) - will have to do.

I can just hear Gardy (Coach Dale) saying "my team is on the floor..." after crew chief Tim Tschida comes over with the lineup card and says "Brendan Harris (aka Buddy) at DH???Really?!!!!"

Go Twins (Hickory)

Musings from MN

Needless to say this is one of the crazier weeks in MN sports history. Here are a few thoughts from my perspective on the week that was and hopefully will be...

Last Wednesday the Twins lost Game 3 (0f 4) to the Tigers in Detroit going 3 games back with 4 to go. Without any Major League pitchers (okay, Joe Nathan is Major League), without a guy named Justin Morneau, and the Tigers at home for these last 4, most (including myself) were saying GAME OVER. I was wrong (first time for everything). At this point the rest is history: the Twins win game 4 to inch to within 2 with 3 to go, the Whitey Tidies beat the Tigers 2 out of 3 and the Twins sweep the Omaha Royals to force a game today for the right to play my least favorite team NYY (David and Goliath blog forthcoming).

On Saturday, my favorite team lost to my least favorite team in spirit crushing college football fashion. Next Topic.

Sunday afternoon was the icing on the cake for today's 1 and done playoff with the Tigers.

Add all of this to the circus that was last night at Mall of America Field (what the heck is that anyway?). So while watching my favorite NFL team beat up my least favorite NFL team I check my Facebook account. The swirl of Viking chatter amazes me...this town loves it's Purple. But then I read a tweet by a woman "friend" from Madison....she writes "I wish that ESPN and Brett Favre would just get a room." That's when it hit me (and hopefully her too), that for 16 years we (Vikes Fans) nearly lost our lunch every time the guy completed a pass and the announcers would gush. The ESPN guys were actually doing a pretty good job last night considering the circumstances (Mike Tirico amusingly called it a circus at least 2 times). Until they (Jon Gruden specifically) started talking about how many great throws he had made in practice in years gone by (really?!!! practice, do we really care how he threw a ball in practice 10 years ago....really???). So they show this "never been released" footage of Brett Favre throwing passes in practice in his GB days. Yes, they showed him throw at least ten 40-50 yard passes in practice....probably the worst sports broadcasting moment since the Natalie Gulbis show aired on the Golf Channel in 2007.

All in all, a fun few days up in here in Minny....and we haven't even dropped a puck yet (professionally anyway, my 9 year old has been going strong since August 25)!

If all goes well, another Fave team will be playing my least Fave this week.

Go Twins.

College Football 2009 - Big Style

From the sounds of it, the NCAA has cancelled this year's college football season and has already crowned Florida the National Champions. It's too bad because there were going to be some great stories here in Big Ten country:

1. A once proud program will rise from the ashes in its new stadium.

2. A flash in the pan program will show its weak under belly and fire its young, troubled head coach after he dismantled the program in 3 short years.

3. The Rose Bowl will have a visitor it hasn't had in nearly 50 years.

4. Biggest Disappointment in B10 country may be those wanting tickets....this will be a great season, lots of great games, lots of great players about to be household names.

5. A once proud team with a unique helmet will fail the bowl eligibility exam again this year

6. Indiana is terrible

7. There will be 3 coaches dismissed this year (one before the season ends)...one is cheesy , one is sleazy and one is easy.

8. A lowly recruited WR from Cold Spring, MN will be invited to NYC in early December

9. Coach of the year will be that little Irish guy in Chicago...

Sorry can't think of a tenth.

I love college football.

Go Gophs, beat Syracuse.

Optimistic Prediction for the Gophers (8-4) Realistic Prediction for Gophers (6-6, 3-5)

Hope Sellers

I go off the professional or semi-professional route and take a stab at something new: Hope Sellers.

Ever walk into a youth sports venue lately and notice the hope that is being sold to parents?  In the past two years I have coached several youth sports teams.  But, as each day goes by each kid gets more and more specialized. Today I will tackle two of the culprits of kids specializing in sports at a very young age.

Before I take some well deserved shots at some of the culprits...I need to tell a story of a neighbor boy, let's call him Sue (one of my favorite Johnny Cash Songs).  Sue is by far the most talented kid his age in just about every sport he's ever played:  Hockey, Baseball, (I heard he was awesome at) Soccer, Horseshoes, Lawn Darts, and Bowling (yes, bowling I saw him fire a clean strike at a 7 year old birthday party.)  As they say on TV, Sue is a natural (hand/eye, speed, agility, etc).  Heck, he's even got good blood lines (kinda like a race horse).

Sue has yet to live a full decade of life and his Dad (culprit #1) told me this is his last year of baseball (poor kid hasn't even seen or thrown a curve ball yet and he's getting the hook).  In sadness, our neighborhood 9 just lost one of, if not it's best player.  Why would he pull him out of baseball at such a young age?  Hockey dads know where this is going already.....Sue is going to start playing hockey year-round. You guessed it, 9 years old and his sports world is now down to 1.....Wow. 

Is this all Dad's fault?  Mostly. But, there are other culprits....let's call them secondaries.  The first one is this new cottage industry of Hope Sellers.  People selling parents the hope that their kid is going to play such-and-such sport at the highest level.  One such organization, Minnesota Made in Edina, MN, tells parents that players aren't born they are made!!!!

Hmmmmmm....if they told the truth, "Johnny sucks, save your money!" , I'm sure they'd go out of business.  So, instead, they ignore the obvious fact that a kid like Sue with or without training and dedication is going to go far, but a kid like Johnny will not.  Why?  Johnny sucks and Sue is the bomb.

End of Story.

Why do I write this?  It all went down over the past month on the baseball diamond.  

Over the years, I've coached several baseball teams, taught numerous clinics, and worked  the John Anderson (U of MN) baseball camp in college.  One night at practice while doing drills with my pitchers, a kid says to me, "Coach, my Pitching Coach tells me......." I really don't remember how the sentence ended because I fainted on the spot.  After I was revived, I awoke to another boy telling me...."his pitching coach says he should......" instead of fainting this time, I spoke up.  Boys, if your pitching coach is so great, then why isn't he out here today coaching you?  The smarter of the two boys raises his hand and says, "cuz you don't get paid and he does...".  To that I replied, "Ahaaaaaaa" (sort of like the Jewish Eddie Murphy in Coming to America)!!!!!!!!!' " The kids didn't get my Aha.  But I did. My point:  That guy is trying to make a buck...plain and simple.  So he'll tell any parent, any kid that he's good as long as he's writing a check out to Hope Seller, Inc.  Sorry to go nostalgic here, but what happened to practicing what you learned from your well qualified coach with your dad, mom, brother, neighbor, etc? Today, dad just dumps the kid off and writes some washed up ex-pro a check and calls it a day.  When I was growing up I had some great non-parent coach role models (Wizzy Wyatt, Al Frost, Quincy Brown).  These guys taught us the game, we went home and practiced it with whomever and we said thank you when the season was over.  Over the last two years I have watched way too many kids go the route of Sue at way too early of an age.  

Please, do your kids a favor.  Instead of making them play just one sport....make them play one more sport.  Heck, they may even enjoy it.

Rant over.