A letter to Carl

The following is a letter written to my good friend Carl Monty who has lived in Hong Kong since January. Believe it or not, Carl likes the blog.

Dear Carl,

Hope the family is doing well and you've adjusted to the Asian lifestyle. The sports landscape has definitely changed since you left the States. Here are just a few highlights:

1. NBA refs fix games. This is the same set of guys who were cashing in First Class Tickets for Coach and keeping the money. Wasn't that a sign of things to come? Another sad sign of the once proud NBA.

2. Barry Bonds The Martyr. He hits 755 in San Diego and gets standing ovation (couldn't believe it). Then he hits 756 at home, and somehow the next day everyone and their brother is Barry's buddy and Bud Selig is the Goat for not being there. I had my left foot in the Barry-is-alright Camp until I saw an interview and he was wearing a hat that had "756" embroidered on it. Are you kidding me? Do you think Cal Ripken had a hat made that said "2,131"? No. Because he wasn't a complete idiot.

3. NFL Quarterbacks kill dogs. Michael Vick will confess to owning a dog kennel that raised dogs to fight other dogs. That's right fight other dogs. Several dogs were killed if they weren't tough enough. No this isn't an April Fool's joke. He's out of the NFL for at least 2 years. So much for an improved society. My guess is he won't be suiting up for the Cleveland Browns when he comes back!

4.Playoffs ain't what they use to be. The FedEx Cup starts this week in golf and the best player in the world doesn't need to show up in order to win. Can you name another sport where you physically don't have to show up to win?

5. The Gophers have good coaches. Tubby Smith is going to lead the Gophers to their first Big Ten Title since 1997 (error, 1982) and Tim Brewster is already turning heads as the football coach. His first recruiting class is already rated #4 in the Big Ten (18th nationally) and season ticket sales are already up 30 percent from last year. Imagine 50,000 fans for a Bowling Green game. WE'RE COMING!!!!!

6. The Pittsburgh Pirates Suck. Okay, they stunk before you left but taking a shot at the Buccos is always fun. (In a Lobl tone of voice):Great Stadium, Great Uniforms, Terrible Team.

Hope to talk to you soon.

TZ